A HEART INSPIRED

Time. A blessing and a curse. A friend and a foe. Time and its passing. As a kid, there were moments when time literally stood still. There were moments that barely made an impression, only to reappear as a foggy image...many, many years later. Time. It could not move quickly enough for me. Only now, I cannot get it slow down. Where does it go, where has it gone? I want some of it back. Mom's will say there is never enough of it, kids will always want more. From  nine to five and then from five to eleven, it all comes down to how much time is left. I want some of it back. I want to rewrite some of it. I cannot wait to write the rest of it. God says that one minute is like a thousand, and a thousand like one. Can you even imagine it? A time, when time won't matter. It will just be endless and always new, at the same time.  The kids keep holding on for the perfect time to come. They reflect often on how perfect life was. They wait expectantly for it to be so again. I

I spent the day quietly. I didn't open my Bible...but neither did I put the television on. I have been enjoying 'silence' recently. I did put my Christian radio station on half way through my day, but that was just to draw me nearer to God. I followed my heart. And that's where it led me. I visited some Christian web sites and was blessed with a Proverbs 31 Woman teaching. (Always a favorite). I have never been able to just sit in the silence....always having to have either music or TV in the background; something, anything to direct my thinking... away from thoughts that could have the power to consume me. I am a thinker. Sometimes to my own chagrin. But lately, I have grown to enjoy it, the silence; remarkably, I have stopped being afraid, {and intimidated and consumed by the stillness}. Which ever way you look at it, the need for constant noise, or company, like I'd call it, stemmed from a fear. Kind of. I think the things I was avoiding were the conversation

I've always been honest on this blog. Ridiculously so. I don't know any other way to be. Especially behind the computer screen. Some of you may think that to be not wholly true, considering that all of the pictures I post of myself are a few years old and well, not completely a true depiction of my real appearance. To justify that, I'll just go ahead and claim ignorance, but I won't deny it. Its true. I take terrible pictures. Always have. So, any half decent picture of me is on my FB. Truthfully speaking, there are no good 'current' pictures, so why would I post them? And if there was a half decent "chubby" picture of mommy the kids are instructed to delete them into the black abyss that never was. This is the extent of my 'dishonesty' capabilities. Oh, and that little thing I do with friends or the general public, where I always smile and always say "everything is fine". This is not new for me. I've always been that way. A lot