Humbled Again

I cannot believe where this life has landed me. If you could see my life through my eyes, you would see the very distant future. Seldom, do I envision a year or two ahead. It's always decades...out of reach. Yet, that is what I have been focusing on. Probably, because life seems so difficult right now. Don't get me wrong, life is good. It's just, there are alot of things to worry about. Mostly survival. Keeping a roof over our heads and food on the table are my biggest worries. So, I often allow my thoughts to drift beyond the here and now. Where I'm certain life will be easier. The kids will all be grown, with their own families and I'll be free to work all sorts of crazy hours and not have to be concerned about the children. Going back to my first sentence.... I cannot believe where this life has landed me. Here, right now. In the very place I thought I would never be; Free spirited enough to take my dreams by the horns and run with them!

A novel. Me. Now.

 I can hardly believe it. I won't be writing about it again. I just wanted to share this awesome moment in my life. God has been so, so gracious to me.  To allow me, even in the midst of  such uncertainty. The time. The mental clarity. The courage. The desire. That He would bless me with the  words. I am overwhelmed at the gift of it all. I know, I know, I'm getting way ahead of myself. It may be that no one will ever read it. And that's okay. It's just that ....well.... I get to write it. How awesome is that? To have had this dream. That's all it was, a dream.

So why now? Why not ten years ago? Why not ten years from now? That's not for me to know. I have to trust that the Lord has this time for me. It certainly, in my opinion is not the time...but what do I know? Well, I know this. I know that the seed was planted. That just a few weeks ago, the stem poked through my earth....I  can feel the roots stretching. It tickles...this growing. When the tears come, from the shear joy of it....it must be God sprinkling the precious drops of water I need to grow. What I used to call my hot flashes, are now the sunlight urging me to bud. This is really going to happen. I pray this joy and gratitude reach Him. For He is so deserving.

That I would just be sitting here, in sunny Florida, minding my own business, wishing and dreaming. He has answered so many of my prayers. Truly, I can't explain why I am surprised at this one. So, it will have to be on pure faith that I receive this. Nothing, but pure faith. Thank you Daddy God.

~ Psalm 103:13 ~

Just as parents are kind to their children, the Lord is kind to all who worship him.