Trading Ashes For Beauty

Christians have a language all of our own. In each others company we inevitably steer our conversation toward the direction of inquiring of the Lord's presence in our lives. We acknowledge Him and His goodness, we praise Him....we comfort one another with His promises. It really is a dialect, all on its own, unlike those of non-believers. I smile just thinking about it. Often, in the presence of a non-Christian, I find myself longing for this comforting dialogue.

There is a term often used in Christian Speak...."Don't Believe The Lies". These lies are the untruths whispered to us...either in our own minds, through media and society, sometimes, through the people we choose to associate with, sometimes, even from our loved ones.

These lies are not of God. They are from the deceiver. The one who comes to kill, steal and abolish.

When I was much younger, I heard these voices whispered. You are not pretty enough; You are not smart enough. You will never, ever be enough. Growing up without a father in the home didn't, at the time, seem such a detriment. Yet, somewhere underneath all of the false bravado, was a little girl who just knew....that she was not enough.

Sometimes, it is not the audible whispers that cause the most damage. Sometimes it is the screaming silence in the absence of love, that hurts the most.

So, what does a young girl who doesn't know the love of a father do with this lacking. Well, when she learns that she possesses a power in a certain look; In a certain way she moves her body; In the words she uses to allure; She creates for herself a path...a path that is lonely, sad and just plain old unsatisfying. She has fallen for the lies. Hook, line and sinker.

She will learn that, in enticing the opposite sex, she is powerful. She will cry and wonder why she is hell bent on destroying any good thing in her life. Hell bent on being the one to push away and quit first. She will believe that it is better to throw the first dagger than to lay in wait of the first blow. Yup, more lies. She will never believe that one is honest, trusting and truly capable of loving her. After all, her own father didn't.

She will marry even though her betrothed will have proven himself unfaithful in his intentions, desires and lustful pursuits, just three weeks before her wedding. At the time, she will proclaim that one cannot disappoint the 150 guests. The plans have been made, the money spent, the festivities already on their way. She will choose to believe the lies.

Truth being...if the wedding were to be cancelled, the whole world would know that she was unlovable...that she just was not enough.

Scratch that....That should read....Lie being....

Someone who does not know her worth, would not know that the lie was not about her at all. But about the one doing the deceiving. Having exposed the truth would have exposed the liar. Would have thwarted the thief. Would have obliterated the abolisher.

But honestly, how many of us would ever grasp this on our own. Their are plenty of women who have had wonderful, loving, attentive fathers who still fall for this nonsense and always have. It is the challenge of a lifetime raising kids to not believe the false sludge being tossed at them on a daily basis.

Today, my oldest and I talked...like teen aged girls and their mothers will. The conversation, took us somewhere unexpected. The conversation, landed us somewhere familiar. I shared with my oldest, the ugly truth of what it looked like...being that young girl, sitting in her bedroom; the sunshine streaming in through the window, totally contradicting the events that were about to take place; with her wedding dress hanging from the door frame, just three weeks from her wedding day. Who had learned that yet again, she was not enough.

I held her beautiful face in my hands, looked into those very trusting eyes. The eyes that look so much like my own. And with tears brimming, I shared with her the value she holds in the Lord's own eyes. I made her promise, to never, ever allow anyone to make her feel as though she were not enough. Because to One, she is more than enough. She is everything.

You may be wondering, why anyone would write about such personal events, for fear that it may evoke pity...even cause a putrid taste on ones tongue. Well, because, one; I am a writer, a story teller, two; the truth brings light, is not meant for a tomb, three; to set forth on a path of healing, to get out of the pit, four; to claim victory in a fallen world, to take back a voice, five; to take hold the claim, to shout from a mountaintop..."I am enough, to the One Who counts!"

I may not embrace this truth moment to moment. And truthfully speaking, I would have to admit my own participation in this conspiracy. And I may be, somewhat to blame for even verbalizing these lies to my own reflection looking back at me from the mirror. At times. But mostly, there is a different voice whispering to my heart these days. They are from my Daddy. My Abba. And they are sweet and endearing. Telling me that I am more than enough. Telling me that I am the very sweet thing He desired me to be. These are the whispers I choose to hear. These are the whispers I cling to.

So, I will leave you with the most endearing sentiment and words spoken repeatedly in a beautiful scene from the book/movie.., The Help, by Kathryn Stockett...

Spoken by sweet, Aibileen to sweet, little Mae Mobly... "You is kind. You is smart. You is important"

Yes you! Stop believing in the lies. Turn to the One who speaks truth to your precious heart. He will never fail you. He will never reject you. He does and always will, love you.

~

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
 
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